She's with me

One afternoon in September 2004 I showed up on my friend's doorstep with tears rolling down my cheeks.  Holding my precious little girl in my arms, I looked to my friend with complete confidence that she would allow me to melt in her presence while I tried to absorb the news the doctors had just given me.  This was the first real day of a journey that the Lord would use to show His love, grace, mercy & faithfulness in my life.

Jessie & I fell to our knees in prayer over the words that had been placed over my sweet daughter.  "Failure to Thrive" echoed in my mind, heart & soul.  What did this mean?  Why wasn't my little girl growing?  We went straight to the father and before His throne we pleaded for healing, growth & direction.  In the days that followed, I was humbled as the elders of the church came and poured their heart out to the Lord on behalf of Faith. 

So much has happened since those early days of this journey.  It has been 5 years 7 months and 26 days since that first day.  I would be lying if I said the road was easy.  It has been full of hope and discouragement.  It has had miles of sweet moments and moments of rocky hills that were only meant to be maneuvered by a King.  There have been tears of joy & of sorrow along the way. 

Today I stand with tears of joy in my eyes. Today is the day that the doctors told me that Faith is no longer "failure to thrive". This is a day of victory over labels that need not be on my blessed daughter- a daughter of the King! Our journey is not over but today I stand proud and say "Look at what my God has done!" Faith's full name means "to trust" "God is gracious". Yes, He is gracious indeed.

Collin Raye - She’s with me

She's with me

I proudly tell the maitre de as we arrive

He seems surprised

In a clumsy moment as he looks for room, for her blessed chair

A table stares, and their eyes show only pity

as they try to sympathize

Oh, how difficult that must be, look away

Day after day, they’ll never see, the joy you bring

I'm only happy at the times I know that she’s with me

I wear it like a badge of honor at the mall

I hear her call, the only way that she is able with a cry

Time to go bye bye, she can’t say why

Maybe tired, maybe hurting, god I wish that I could tell

Do I ever make her happy for awhile

To see her smile, makes my week,

Though she can’t speak,

She let’s me know she feels my love when she’s with me

I know just what heaven looks like when I see that perfect face

For no other mortal heart could be so fair

I myself so weak and weary, so imperfect as a man

How could I be the one you chose to care for our girl

Never done a single deed to earn the right to share her light

Though it’s such a painful road we walk each day

Lord you have your ways, this I pray

On the day I stand before you, she’ll stand right by my side

When you look upon me, head hung down in shame

I’ll feel the blame, she’ll look at me,

And then she’ll speak, in that precious voice

Don’t worry ‘bout him my lord, cuz you see,

He’s with me